I. mêmêkwêsisak
pêyak 1.
I closed my eyes
before the hands
connecting to
his father and mosom
pushed
so hard
when I landed
my spine became
an accordion
playing their passed down
generational rhythms
the music
stopped
and I
couldn’t move
niso 2.
I opened
my eyes became
a mirror to my self
laying on my stomach
hair pulled to the side
mosôm and kôhkom
mêmêkwêsisak standing
on my bare back
they’ve split it open
from the base of my spine
to the top of my neck
like a zipper
muscle and ligaments
interlocking vertebra
laminae facets
discs
small moons
nisto 3.
mosôm
grey pants plaid shirt
suspenders and gum rubbers
nickel colored braids with
little pieces of red cloth
interwoven tying them tight
earth face set seriously
little pipe sticking out
from the side of his mouth
bone awl in hand
he pierces with precision
pulling a thread of sinew
brown as my skin
using his knee the
size of my thumb
knuckle as leverage
newo 4.
kôhkom
red kerchief
multi-patterned dress
beaded high tops match earrings
underneath furrowed silver
soft amber eyes
she stands
two wood bowls and
a little basket beside her
voice lilting
a gentle anesthesia
awake and sleeping
I drift
on the waves of her song.
niyanan 5.
I feel a warm liquid
pour over the point
where the needle went
an inspiration caresses
my lungs faint sikiwin
semaa and wood smoke
then a heavier stickier drop
touches and takes me
to blueberry picking
under a hot sun
cedar sage sweet grass
the âtayôhkanak surround me
until I’m sewn up
eyes welling
nikotwasik 6.
I try to hold back
nosisim cry cry let go let go
it’s ok nosisim cry cry
they whisper catching my tears
in copper vessels
mistikwaskihkos sounding
breaks my sobs
a multitude of voices rise
like the span of the stars
past present and future meld into
song
help her find her way
soft whispers echo
they offer my tears
up to the stars
tepakohp 7.
Mide Wabo
Mide Wabo
Mide Wabo
Mide Wabo
You will find your way.
II. The Little Boy
fat brown legs moving quickly
little and stocky
on wrap-around moccasins
black hair long loose
soft slight curl at ends
a maskwa made little boy
“C’mon,” he urges
giggles like waterfalls
echo through the cedar and pine
the damp earth
catches my own moccassined toes
“Wait for me,” I yell
as he jumps in between a split birch
chaga smiling up
“Don’t go” I panicky
try to catch up to him
following the trail of his laughter
under boughs and branches
moss and needles springing back up
from the shape of his little feet
“Wait! Please wait”
“C’mon hurry up! It’s not too late hurry”
I grab onto the syllables
as I glimpse him one more time
a flash of black hair and brown skin
maskwa made little boy
ducks into a large den
I come to a screeching stop
right before the domed entryway
I can’t see past the darkness: “Wait, I…I can’t go in there!”
“Yes, you can C’mon, c’mon!!”
“No I can’t go in there, please come back.”
“You can come in, c’mon
pitikway bindigay come in
come in
III. Entering
“pitikway bindigay come in
you’re ready now
pitikway bindigay come now”
stemaw/semaa inside my left hand
my heart line
an offering of intent
my aim
arrow straight
heart line following the little boy
to the other side
INTENTION
/in’ten(t)SH(∂)n/
noun
1. a thing intended: an aim or plan.
“she was full of good intentions”
the action or fact of intending.
2. Medicine
the healing process of a wound.
his laughter and love
echoing each step I take
my plan
to join him
MEDICINE
my wounds
so many processes needed
my wounds
so many
a few almost as old as me
scarred over some edges ragged
others smooth as stone
some still breaking open
oozing into present moments
like the rings of a tree
a barrier to the light at the center
layer and layer of wounds form
my ahcahk-iskotêw, my soul flame,
gasps for air waning and dimming
I can’t see past the darkness
the more ahcahk-iskotêw dims
the less life you can see
“c’mon” the little boy says
“don’t be afraid
you have to go through it
to come out on the other side”
but I can’t see
how will I know where to go?
maskwa made little boy
takes my hand
“stay open and you will see”
I see
one older than time himself
Mishoomisinaan Dewe’igan
sitting with
nohkomis tipskaw-pisim/Nohkomis
together
they sound
the heart of okâwîmâwaskiy/aki four times
they call down the light of kîsikâwi-pîsim/Giizis
as Mishomis Giizis pulsates the darkness flees
nipiy stills all movement as
she becomes a reflective mirror
of that other realm
an entry point
with all their heart lines connected to mine:
nipiy maskwa made little boy, Mishoomisinaan Dewe’igan,
nohtokwew tipskaw-pîsim/Nohkomis, okâwîmâwaskiy/aki, kîsikâwi-pîsim/Giizis
pahkopê
I walk through the body of nipiy
in her the doorway is illuminated
the echo of nikihci-âniskotâpân multiplied by thousands greet me:
takosin, takosin
pitikway/biindigay
nôsisim
pitikway/ bindigay
tawâw kiya mîkiwâm
IV. piyêsiw: Thunderbird
piyêsiw: Thunderbird
meadow
long sun colored grass
dance with yôtin
moving back and forth
in unison they
touch their heads
to kikawinaw askiy
i can hear their
song under her breath
birch and pine
circling us stand tall
bending to kiss each other
bones creaking
sounding pahkakos
at the center
i hear a great rush
yôtin reaches a crescendo
the grass becomes shadowed
falls flat in reverence
under a span of wings
covering the breadth of
half the meadow
each the equivalent
in width a full grown tree
his voice a soprano screech
as he comes to rest
in front of me
I drop to my knees
hands covering bent
head down shaking
Listen
a voice
inside but out
breaks through
I still all movement
Look
slowly my eyes raise along
the lines of grass to his talons
sinking gently through kikawinaw askiy
her soft brown holding them tightly
Feel
his chest of feathers strong
sinew and sleek muscled neck
a deep yellow beak to his
gold flecked brown gather
the heat of a thousand embers
into one
laser arcs into
the center of my forehead
Don’t be afraid
circles my eyes close
become the lens of
a fast forwarding screen
I Hear I See I Feel
kikawinaw trying to catch her breath
panting desperately
the lines of pipe cut her airway
as the smog fills it
blankets of cement lie
heavy on her heart
crush her breasts
semaa not enough semaa
screaming in pain
she ruptures
sudden rush of nipiy
rolling into sheer rage
nipiy roars
into the cities trying to reach
the sands of tar to speak to the Ones
the acâhosak buried long ago
with wîsahkêcâhk’s help
the wîtihkow Ones the people
let loose in their insatiable desire
for more more more
the stories told of them
and the laws to keep them
contained long forgotten
nipiy calls to those wîtihkow Ones
trying to reason with them
she swallows
towers high rises poles houses cars trucks
boats wires couches chairs desks televisions
computers phones debris of all sorts
people
left
floating
in her body
Those wîtihkow Ones waiting with their mouths wide open
and just as quickly
kikawinaw askiy breathes
a deep inhale
nipiy calming soaks back
into her body
kikawinaw askiy exhales
begins to gasp again
pants again even faster
in sheer terror and pain
nipiy desperate to help her
calls for iskotew hearing her plea
he breaks through the layers and layers
of hardened arteries those wîtihkow Ones
have already sucked dry
the places where nipiy
should have been but
instead those Ones took hold
inside kikawinaw askiy
begins to tremor and shake
as those wîtihkow Ones
following the lines of pipe
fly through her veins
iskotew chases them
trying to catch them
ahead of him they race
those Ones push through
cracking her skin
kikawinaw askiy shudders and flails
towers high rises poles houses cars trucks
boats wires couches chairs desks televisions
computers phones debris of all sorts
people
left
falling
into her body
those wîtihkow Ones waiting with their mouths wide open
nipiy tries to join iskotew but she slows to a trickle then stops
he bursts into tears
towers high rises poles houses cars trucks
boats wires couches chairs desks televisions
computers phones debris of all sorts
people
left
burning
as his sadness fills the air
until it is thick with smoke
those wîtihkow Ones waiting with their mouths wide open
and just as quickly
kikawinaw askiy breathes a deep inhale
iskotew calming
his tears fold into her body
and with her exhale a song is
sung to yôtin for help
towers high rises poles houses cars trucks
boats wires couches chairs desks televisions
computers phones debris of all sorts
people
sucked
up into the sky
as yôtin’s helpers from the four directions
join hands in a round dance then stop
on the honour beats
people
fall
into the mouths of those wîtihkow Ones waiting
and just as quickly
kikawinaw askiy breathes a deep inhale
the four winds dance into her body
with her exhale another song is sung
a song of mourning that is sung so high
it reaches the acâhosak, in their world and
awakens wîsahkêcâhk from his deep sleep.
Together, they return the wîtihkow Ones once again
tying them and burying them once again
they gather the people who are left
to tell them the stories and the laws once again.
My eyes open and the arc dissipates
before he leaves me,
he touches the center
of my forehead with the tip of his left wing
and tells me,
don’t be afraid
Tasha Beeds ©April 2019
Sources: Ed Peekakoot. "kohkom's Lullaby." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH_KDUHB_Mw Glass Star Photo by Rakicevic Nenad on Pexels.comThe Invisible Connection – When Our Soul Knows…https://www.wayfair.ca/decor-pillows/pdp/lintonart-tree-ring-art-print-from-mulberry-tree-graphic-art-lnna1081.htmlCute Bear Cub Standing Uprighthttps://starwalk.space/en/news/full-moon-april-2022 https://phys.org/news/2006-12-heartbeat-earth-climate.html https://www.shutterstock.com/video/clip-10804820-white-rain-gray-haze-dark-black-storm https://time.com/5888449/wildfires-smoke-california-oregon-washington-satellite-space/ https://www.peakpx.com/en/hd-wallpaper-desktop-pxysjFlood risk awareness: Dialogue around “re-location” has arrived
Living Water: The Water Walk Movement 